情绪消耗完毕后

发泄完所有的情绪后就完事了。

给自己最多1星期时间

然后就是振作的时候

工作做好。努力赚钱

每天早睡。11点前就睡

吃的好。水果蔬菜不能少

调理身体。喝补汤

健身健康。跳华族舞

加油 加油 加油

安排好的未来在等着

不真诚不疼爱我的人远离也不待见

I miss the guy

I miss the guy who has eyes for me. Miss the guy that is kind hearted. The guy that will smile whenever he sees me. Willing to do anything for me. Cares for me and willing to solve every problem with me. 

I also miss the guy who has very good patience and good attitude. The guy who always encourage me and willing to accept me for who I am. I miss the guy who always treat me gently. 

I also miss the guy that is always soft spoken to me, decisive and willing to listen to my every story no matter the story is happy, sad or angry.

I miss the guy that can comfort me, give me a hug when I need. Fetch me in order to spend more time with me. 

I miss the guy that was once only mine and only put me priority. 

But now, I lost that guy to someone I cant fight with. I lost the fight to someone who is by his side longer than me. Someone who has more influence than me. Someone I cant fight against and have no chance of winning. lost that guy that used to be so kind hearted and so patient and im upset that there is nth I can do to recover him or us back to how we use to be.

Goodbye

Is time to say goodbye. Telling myself there is nth to be sad about. I tried my best at this chance given and is time to say goodbye. There is no need to stay with someone unworthy of my time and effort. Relationship goes both ways. If he is not willing to try already proves that you are not worth his effort. 

When something is making you worse than before it is time to take a step back to analyze. If all you have is words and no actions they are all just excuses. Actions speak louder than words. Everything I hear is only excuses and complaints. 

There is no such thing as things take time. I only believe in willingness to try and I only see actions. Words doesnt count when there is no actions and no result to prove. I did my part to try. If there is no effort put in by both parties and only complaints remains then there is nth worth in staying in the the relationship for. I dont care how much you earn, how much you have. I can dont care about anything to stay by your side. However, I have basic expectation of my partner. There must be integrity, loyalty, commitment and most importantly responsibility and sincerity, if those are not there, then you no longer have anything worth for me to fight for. If you not sincere to be with me, then leave. I dont need someone to be there for convenience. 

If you cant accept who I am and who I have with me then you are not the one for me. Same thing. I cant accept when you dont hold up to my expectation. You can have all the complaints and explanation on how you cant do everything. To me is all the same. You are either in it with me or excluded. You either do it or you dont. There is no negotiation. If you need to nego what to accept of me it shows Im not important or worth for u to put me in your life. Then neither are you to me. 

Dont need tell me what your mum says or what your mum thinks. I dont care and I cant be bothered. If you think like her and you agree with her then go with her choice. Go with the person she pick for you. If I cant be compared with whoever you have in you mind. Then go wait for whoever you have in your mind. Believe what she say since she is your mum. As your mum, she knows what's best for you anyway. Whatever she say is the best for you.

If you cant be there for me in everything and if you cant fight for me for anything means Im not the one you want to be with. In my relationship, there can only be loyalty and commitment. If I have chosen you to be my partner, I expect the same royalty and commitment from my partner. My partner must be decisive and determined enough to choose me. And I will be there to go through thick and thin with him. If my partner is still sitting on the fence, just enjoying the benefits while rejecting all the negativities that comes with it after a period of time I think the answer is clear. I will only be with someone who can appreciate me, understand me and put me as first priority

Injustice

Feeling so injustice in current state. People can hurt you mentally and emotionally and there is no way in legal law to help. 

But when you take physical actions to protect yourself, you are committing criminal offence. Can sort of understand how helpless a person can be when it comes to family law and civil law. 

Learned criminal law and civil law but nv really been in that kind of situation in order to understand. Now I do. 

Civil law protect you by financial. The bigger amount of money you have, the more possibility you win the case and you can keep appealing. Not sure if civil law also more bias to elderly and kids. But if you want to fight for it, you use money. Not sure if it is really fair and justice in that sense. Most of unethical ways ppl do can only be pursue by civil law and not by criminal law. With this, I feel it is already unjustified. Criminal law protect by government. Automatically protect you from it. If you look into it. You will understand elderly and kids are protected by government automatically. But not adult. Kids have protection because they are young and naive. Elderly are protected because they are consider weak. 

Woman are protected by civil law as they are considered weaker. But because it is not criminal law, a lot of unjustice can happen. Whoever stay in the protection of the court has the power to misuse it. Most commonly seen or feel are elderly nowadays. 

In singapore, elderly are nv weak. Seen a lot of cases of elderly treating themselves like a king or queen and using this elderly privilege given by the government to support their unreasonable actions. Adults are helpless against the situation because once we fight back physically, you are the ones being charge criminal offence. 

Disabled privileges are also more common nowadays. Entitled and well protected by government.  Humans are humans. When they at the good side of biases, they tend to take advantage of it, using it's power to bully other people. 

My generations are the worst. We are always at the disadvantage side. Especially woman. I feel woman tend to be at the weaker end not just physical but also emotionally. Both inbuilt and cant be changed. We are not physical more muscled or emotionally strong. Woman are bullied and abuse through generation by man. Man instill these power and women agree to it. Brainwash and guilt trip by man to do as he says. 

Then these women become the next generation bullies. Feeling unjust and mentally insane, they have give birth to their own kids which give them this entitled sense of owning the kids and abusing their parenting rights and control over kids. Using the same technique as the man to bully and abuse their kids. Controlling them by guilt tripping and brainwashing their minds. With education, kids are no longer controllable as they learn new things, understanding and differentiating right and wrong. 

These kids that are abused also use the same way to abuse either their peers and eventually grow up and start abusing their partners. It is like a cycle. Brainwashing and controlling their partners. Certain things stop with education but not all things can be stop through education and it takes a lot of time to reduce that toxic influence. It is also social norm etc that affects it and with human rights in place. Most things like abuse are more seen into the light. 

Physical abuse is physically hurt etc which can be proven. But emotionally and mental abuse are harder and it can impact a person in ways you can ever imagine. All these impact are unseenable and unmeasurable. Only the perpetrator will understand. They know how it impacts you and they know how to play with your feelings. 

Worse is those perpetrators are protected by the law. The only way to get them is when you have money to burn at civil court. As long as they dont do anything physcial, there is nth the court can do. Unless you are diagnose with depression or mental illness, you may win the case. But it may affect if you have a child to fight for. 

This power they get from you and government are encouraging them to do more to hurt ppl and victimize themselves.