Monday, November 27, 2023

Judgemental and busybody

Some ppl are just so judgemental. Only concern about what others do but nv reflect on their own. Loves to insult and criticise others but nv look at their own behaviours and actions.

Loves to change their minds and decisions as and when they like. Selfish and only concern about their own well being. I feel selfish and self centered are 2 different things. 

Ppl can be self centered because you have to love yourself before you love others. The top priority is you yourself. Having things work around you first naturally is ok. Someone keep telling me doing things that convenient others are doing things that inconvenient yourself. When it comes to a decision to make where u have to choose to inconvenient others or yourself of course choose to inconvenient others.  

The other person is also being self centered by inconveniencing you. A person who is worth to accommodate for will also accommodate u in some other ways. So prioritize only ppl who are worth to you. 

Old school thinking of self sacrificing for the others etc nv worked. My mum didnt sacrifice to stay with my dad just for me. And I am happy she make that choice. Else we will all probably be living a super miserable life. Self sacrificing is stupid and if u make that decision to do that, then dont hold expectation to be grateful or to be returned. Nobody owe u or force u to make that self sacrifices and definitely not your kids. U choose to give birth to them. Not they choose to be alive. 

Having kids has to be purely out of love between u and your partner. The decision to have a kid has to come from you alone. Not because of life cycle, not because your partner wants it, not because need to pass down generation etc. Purely because u wanted it. Once u made that decision, then u will have given your kids the right start in life. Because u given birth out of love and nth else. 

I learn that when I was young. Nv sacrifice my own happiness for anyone. I make my own decisions and I deal with my own consequences. I make mistakes as I go along. Some mistakes are irreversible which I will just have to accept. We have to learn to control emotions and be objective to deal with consequences. It is hard but it is not impossible. 

Ppl can judge and criticise you all the time. And is ok. Leave them out of your life. Real friends and real love who care for u will not criticise you for your actions and decisions. They will not push every fault or mistake from their life to you. Stay away from such ppl because they will nv learn and their happiness depends on pulling u down to hell to join them. They are just narcissist who enjoys seeing ppl angry and suffering.

Therefore just ignore and leave those kind of ppl out. Surround yourself with ppl u trust and love u. Ppl who can keep up with your optimistic and happiness. Ppl who feel happy for u when u are happy. Ppl who are sincere and real. 

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