Cousin day

Today meet my cousins. Organize a dinner together. Long time nv meet up to chit chat. 

Glad that everybody seems to be ok. Talk about work, talk about family, talk about kids and parents in law etc. The typical topics. 

Talk about go exercise healthy etc also. Different lifestyle different family background. Just listen, complain, share. 

I thought only people with kids etc will stress and have insomnia. At least for me that is the case. Then my cousin who are single also say she has insomnia. I ask her why she cant sleep? Think about what? She say nth much. Eyes tired but brain cant sleep. 

Maybe in this era we use too much phone. Brain overly active. I told her try cut caffeine she say cant. She only drink once in morning. Hmm. 

Last time we watch tv drama parents always say not good. Now use phone seems to be even worst. One of my cousin say better to watch those long drama with storyline etc better than short clip. Recommended by doctor. Say better for the brain. Use more brain cells i think. 

I feel genetically illness not so easy to avoid sometimes. I feel my uncle also quite active leh. Everytime help do housework, play mahjong do this and that. Not sure why will dementia also. Like my mum also eat light, exercise ride bike everyday also get high cholesterol. 

Usually these kind very hard to direct to particular cause. Illness is like part and parcel of life. That day my colleague cry also. She was worried about her medical report. I feel quite common. But she said she got a lot of things haven do. So she scare. I say ok la. U just start doing what u want. 

For me everyday i live my life happily. There isnt much for me to do. She ask if i got any bucket list to do. Honestly i dont. I use to have goal but my goal now is just to travel. But i travel every year also. I dont expect myself to see entire world actually so ok. 

After my divorce i realize nth is very important anymore. I kind of let go of everything. She asl about life purpose. I thought about it before. But to me you dont have an answer. And nv will. End of the day is what u believe in. To me life is just life. U learn, u go through what u have to and then it ends. 

Just like a cycle. Human evolution and animal evolution. Just keep repeating. U are just one of the human life repeating the cycle evolving in the process and next generation etc. For me i dont want to change the world, i just want to live and experience life as it is. Accompany ppl who I appreciate and make sure i leave no regrets when i pass. That's all. I just guide my daughter what i learn and then she continue on ahead. Anyway in her era things i learn during mine may not be relevant anymore to her. 

Nevertheless i feel emotional control is a good skill to learn. Empathizing, understanding is always useful. But one can never be too kind. Learn to know who is truthful and who is not. The more u experience good or bad at young age, the more u are aware, the faster u learn from mistake and pick up skills. There is nth u learn faster than u experience yourself. 

Ytd my girl so funny. She ask a friend of hers. Male one. Who do u want to marry when u grow up. Her friend say u. She very happy. I ask her she want marry him? She say yes. Why? Cause the friend very nice to her. Will give her things or something. I say well u still got choices. Dont need rush into decision. Still young.